its a beautiful day in the neighborhood

11:30 A.M.

Walked into the American Federation of Music on Music Row. It is gray outside. Aubrey and I spend fifteen minutes interacting with 60 year old Country Barbie at the counter before we realize all the execs are at Porter Wagoner's funeral at the Opry House, and since my grandfather thought Porter was a freak we were not in attendance.

Then we went to a costume shop and bought a John F. Kennedy mask. The lady at the counter was wearing Versace glasses and had perfect teeth, but I recognized her at the nightmare-inducing witch from the commercials for the shop. I told her she was often featured in my nightmares and she said that turned her on. We left.

I pick up some doughnuts, by request of my grandfather.

We get back and he has a meeting. Three pseudo-important people sit around chomping on doughnuts and I needed to sit there and take the minutes. I chewed on the doughnuts and spit them out into napkins when people werent looking because I must stay faithful to my crash diet that I have recently undertaken.

I told my grandfather I needed to go to the gym and had to leave work early.

"Gotta get yourself in shape for the casting couch..." he said.

"Yah," I said, and fluttered out the door.

now I will do 300 hundred crunches and jump rope until I pass out.

Then I will go to the Alleycat lounge and drink Blue Valiums until they have to carry me out on a stretcher.



how was your day?